I love God, I believe that his Son, Jesus Christ, is my Savior, and I rely on God alone for everything, but it hasn’t always been this way. I grew up in a Christian household. My mom and aunt are believers. In my eyes, my aunt wasn’t only a believer, she seemed as though she was married to the Lord. It wasn’t just because she went to church, but she was always in the Word and praying. We went to church every Sunday and, sometimes, with my aunt we (my sister and I) would go Wednesdays and Fridays as well. I come from a cultural background where around the age of 12, most kids go through the process of getting baptized. So when that time came around I decided not to get baptized. I now see that I didn’t feel ready to commit and be held accountable for my actions in that proclamation.
At 14 my mom allowed me to make my own decision on whether or not I went to church. I continued to go, but it wasn’t as regular, and I started to drift away more and more as the years went along. I started to live my life with a seasonal type of relationship with the Lord. During some seasons I would rely on the Lord and during other seasons I would rely on myself. At some point, I stopped going to church all together and was only relying on my own strength.
Things changed on March 5, 2012. I was always a very physically active person and continued to be in my adulthood. Whether it was sports or marching band, I was always on the go, relying on my own strength. In January 2012, I was playing basketball and I somehow tore my ACL and meniscus. On March 5, 2012 my life changed. On that day I got my ACL reconstruction surgery. I didn’t realize that a change was going to start at the time. I believe it was the next day or the following week I started to go to Bible study with my then girlfriend/now amazing wife. During the beginning of this journey, I went through about a two- or three-week span of depression from not being able to be physically active. I never remembered feeling that way before. Honestly, the only reason I started to go to Bible study was because I wasn’t really able to do anything and I wanted something to do.
I continued to go to Bible study and the ways of the Lord were constantly being revealed to me. As these revelations were presented to me, I was convicted and made the necessary changes to live more according to the Word of the Lord. A couple months into this journey, I started to go to church again, and the Lord continued to speak to me in various ways. With his strength, the changes in my life were and are being made.
I came to realize that my ACL being torn wasn’t a curse, but a blessing. God communicates to us as individuals and everyone is different. For me it was slowing me down physically and showing me that I wasn’t in control in a way that affected me the most, and through that he was truly able to work in me. With the Lord’s strength, I made a full recovery and was able to be active again, but this time it was different. I was no longer relying on my own physical strength, but relying on the Lord’s strength to do any and everything.
My wife has supported me a lot through my spiritual journey. She loved me when we were just friends. She was on her own journey at the time and when we started dating she wanted to do things the right way. Her commitment and her support to me has help me by making me accountable in the ways of the Lord. I’ve also been blessed with a son and, through him, the Lord continues to work in me. His teachings never end and I’m grateful for His love.
Now I not only want to allow Christ to be in my life, but I want him to be in control of all aspects of my life. I want his guidance on every decision that is made. It’s not easy and it takes constant effort, but I want to live for the Lord. I want to live according to the Lord’s will and not my own. I want the Lord to soften my heart so I can better hear him, better understand him and better receive him. I want my wisdom, strength, vision and guidance to come from the Lord.
I’ve been on this journey for just over six years now and not once have I really considered getting baptized, but in the last month something has changed. I’ve had a spirit of conviction on the topic of baptism and felt a strong urge to get baptized. I was planning on going to one of the baptism workshops, but then I was distracted by the things of the world and missed all the workshops.
During service, on July 14, I was once again convicted of getting baptized. It was put into my heart that If I’m willing to fight for other things why not fight for what’s most important? Why not fight for the Lord? That is what I’m doing now. I missed the workshops, but I’m not going to ignore the Word of the Lord. I’m going to fight and if it’s the Lord’s will, this baptism will happen. My belief will not only be known to those around me and myself, but to the world. I will make this proclamation to the world that Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior.